Whiny kids complain about prize X-mas gifts

[lazybonesd]

Last night I informed my 14 yr old that I could not afford to buy her the massive list of music she has on her Amazon wish list, especially since she claimed 8 recent CD wins of mine as X-mas gifts. She threw a fit saying that prize win gifts should be 'extra' gifts thrown in and not counted on the amount I generally spend for X-mas. My 12 yr old has been bugging me to death for the video game win thats already been wrapped, knowing that if I give it now, I'll feel obligated to buy more gifts for under the tree.

So how about it parents. Should prize win gifts just be extra loot in addition to the usual amount? Or used to help us parents in tight financial situations so we can get away with spending less? Am I the only loser who's raising such ungrateful kids?

lazybonesd

[noelleray]

well,i guess i should be happy dd is too little to realize. i say use them as gifts and do not feel guilty. dh's Christmas presents are almost entirely wins and the rest are from awesome deals.

[Balayeur]

There are a number of comments I could make, but I won't - - instead, C O N G R A T S 1st of all for winning
alot of cool prizes/gifts for yr kids - - I wouldn't tell yr kids when you win something. I would keep the wins back for gifts..:gift:.. for them !

[Markslady]

I never open any wins I receive in front of my kids. They can enjoy the ones I choose to take out and share, but they never know what I have hidden away for Christmas. A gift is a gift no matter where it comes from or how much you paid, or didn't pay, as the case may be :)

[udalum]

I never let my son know if I have won something for him. And, if a package comes to the door, and he asks what it is, I say "make-up". Tell your kids the package is something else (make it up, and make it boring to them).

[southflgirl]

I also do not tell the kids about wins that might make good gifts. They would be very upset if I gave them wins as Christmas gifts. What they don't know won't hurt them in this case.

[lazybonesd]

You all are so right. Throughout next year I'm going to be stashing stuff away without letting them even know about it. The whole family has made fun of me so much since I started this hobby, that I felt I had to show them every win, so they'd see that what I do all day is worth something, but no more!

lazybonesd

[Balayeur]

..:cheer5:..

[Hkleinva]

SOUNDS LIKE YOUR KIDS SHOULD BE GETTING LUMPS OF COAL!

Just Kidding!

[jndperry]

I would point out to the kids that you give them gifts because you WANT to, not because it is some sort of maternal obligation. There is no place in the parenting rulebook where it says, "Once you have a child, you MUST spend at least $300 per child each Christmas." Tell them that you will stop giving them sweeps wins if that's what they really want, but that you have a limited budget, and they will get the same amount of non-sweeps gifts regardless.

I would also have to agree with what others have said- I would not open any wins in front of them. I know this is much easier with my 2- and 3-year-olds than with teenagers, but just let them know that any packages that come are YOURS, and they don't open them. Then when they get a gift at Christmas, they have no idea whether it is a win, or you are just the most generous mom in town!

[mlynch20]

Tell your kids they're ungrateful brats, and they should be glad to be receiving anything for Christmas, as there are millions of people here and abroad who will be thrilled to even have a warm meal for Christmas. Heck, make the little snots work at a homeless shelter on Christmas, so they can gain some perspective. It's natural for kids to not have much perspective or appreciation for what they have; it's a parent's job to give it to them.

I'm not even a Christian, and I hate hearing about this greed at Christmas. The holiday is about some guy named Jesus who allegedly performed a lot of good deeds. It's not about Black Friday or wasting money on the latest overpriced gadget. So, no, don't feel that you should spend any extra on your kids. If I were in your position, I'd give their gfts to kids really in need. See if they whine next year.

[MeriTeri]

I Hide Everything That I Think Would Make A Good Xmas Gift.

[wildbirds]

The way I look at it is YOU worked for what you've won. It takes time to enter all these sweepstakes so it can turn into somewhat of a job. A gift is a gift is a gift! If they whine, give it to a child who may not get anything at all for Christmas.

[TrishMc107]

I'm giving prizes as Christmas gofts. Not extra gifts.
Your daughter needs a reality check. Times are tough. Be happy with whatever she gets.

[michele]

Maybe make them this!
http://organizedchristmas.com/article74.html

[pharaoh]

SENT THOSE TWO LITTLE RUG RATS TO ME FOR THE NEXT 30
YEARS THEY CAN WORK ON MY PYRAMID..THEN WHEN YOU GET
THEM BACK... THEY WILL APPRECIATE YOU.

PHARAOH RON

[Angels Fan]

I think this is a (sad) reflection of how things are now. I know that my nieces just rip open their gifts, barely glance at them and then ask for the next one. This really hurts my parents feelings, especially when they have spent so much time picking out the perfect gift.

I don't know how to solve it though. We live in such a gimme, gimme, gimme time and Christmas has just turned into a time to accumulate "stuff".

When I was little (the 80's) I would get one "big" present like a doll and then a few smaller gifts and my stocking. That's it!

Good luck

[pattyepye]

I'm not even a Christian, and I hate hearing about this greed at Christmas. The holiday is about some guy named Jesus who allegedly performed a lot of good deeds. It's not about Black Friday or wasting money on the latest overpriced gadget. So, no, don't feel that you should spend any extra on your kids. If I were in your position, I'd give their gfts to kids really in need. See if they whine next year.

I agree, greed can ruin the good times at Christmas. Parents feel guilty because they can't afford everything on the list. Give them the wins with pride, as this is what Providence has bestowed. :gift:

You can't blame the kids though, peer pressure, TV, etc. they are overwhelmed. Try doing some inexpensive fun things, like making cookies, and homemade gifts for the less fortunate.

Good luck,

[feline~ fantastic]

You are so not alone. Every kid I know in this day & age is ungrateful, especially mine. He's grown now so I can say all I want, :laugh: :laugh: Really I should blame his dad for buying him everything under the sun that he wanted when he was little. I think alot of the reason kids nowadays are so ungrateful is because they have it too good. When I was a kid, I appreciated anything I got, nomatter how insignificant it was. I might get flak for saying all this but I just think parents from the good ol' days disciplined when we needed it & definately we were not spoiled. Thats not to say we weren't loved or had everything we needed cuz we did; we were just well behaved. :binky: I was always the 'bad guy" raising our kids because if I said no to him, he knew all he'd have to do is go running to his dad & he'd go behind my back & get it for him. That's so NOT the way a marriage is supposed to work; (we're not married anymore). Gee, I wonder why. I'll take a chill pill now but I just had to get that off my chest. You're post about your kids not wanting your wins as gifts struck a nerve because mine would expect extra too. :twocents: I apologize for going off like this.

[smileysal]

This is my first year of sweeping. At first I felt guilty giving wins as gifts and felt like I should buy a gift to. I don't feel that way any more. I spend a lot of time entering sweeps. Time that could be spent on doing other things. At first I was like you and would open the packages in front of my family to show that I wasn't waisting my time. If they saw the prize I would give it to them but now I am smarter and I never open a package in front of anyone.
My son is 13 and I know if he saw a win he would think he shouldnt have to wait until Xmas to have it. Your kids are just acting liking normal kids trying to see how much more they can get. I wouldn't give in and stick to your original plan. Every year I have my son do an act of kindness during the Christmas season. This usually helps him in understanding the spirit of Christmas not just the gift aspect.

[tiffnat]

I have a 15 yr old daughter who is also like this. A month ago we both worked at a woman's shelter sorting used clothes and damaged food for the poor. It really woke her up that not everyone is as lucky as she is. She mentions it now and then and has a better perspective of what is important. You may want to check out volunteering with your kids at a shelter-especially one that has moms and kids. It's eye opening for them.

[Gomez]

I agree completely with everything mlynch20 said. I just had a baby last week and my biggest fear about being a father is that I'll end up with some spoiled brat picky eater kid. I see spolied kids all the time and I just want to slap them.

"Tell your kids they're ungrateful brats, and they should be glad to be receiving anything for Christmas, as there are millions of people here and abroad who will be thrilled to even have a warm meal for Christmas. Heck, make the little snots work at a homeless shelter on Christmas, so they can gain some perspective. It's natural for kids to not have much perspective or appreciation for what they have; it's a parent's job to give it to them.

I'm not even a Christian, and I hate hearing about this greed at Christmas. The holiday is about some guy named Jesus who allegedly performed a lot of good deeds. It's not about Black Friday or wasting money on the latest overpriced gadget. So, no, don't feel that you should spend any extra on your kids. If I were in your position, I'd give their gfts to kids really in need. See if they whine next year."

[mpumr]

I personally see nothing wrong with giving wins out as gifts and not buying additional stuff. Now I haven't had to deal with this yet (only have won two things so far) plus my kids are too little to really notice. But I have decided (and don't mean to sound like a grumpy Scrooge) that my kids are going to get about 4 gifts a piece plus their stockings, that's it. The gifts aren't going to be pricey, I can't afford too much so I will be checking out Big Lots, etc. Plus I really feel that if you can start them out early enough on my plan, as they get older hopefully they won't expect a brand new sports car on their 16th birthday.

I love my kids and would give up my life for them; but I feel that many parents over-indulge in the gift giving. It's not neccessary, I don't recall every item that my parents gave me for Christmas or my birthdays. I would rather have my kids growing up in a home that didn't survive from paycheck-to-paycheck and be drowning in credit card debt, something which I'm currently working on.

Okay, I'll get of the soapbox now! :)

Marsha :supstar:


Edited after seeing Gomez's post: Congrats on the baby! It's okay to spoil as babies, how can you resist :gvibes: ? And I feel that there are times when it's okay to indulge when they are toddlers, but my oldest (5 yrs old) thinks that every single time we go somewhere he needs to get something. It has been hard breaking him of this way of thinking and we still work on it. I know that I didn't grow up this way and I don't want my kids to do so either. I too want to slap the snot at the spoiled kids that I see in the stores. You are not alone in this!

[marilyn lux]

My cousin told me something that really made me think when her family was here for Thanksgiving.

Her youngest is now 12 and just got the word on Santa last year.

My cousin was telling her about a certain tribe in Africa who utilize every part of a goat, which often means their survival. Her 12 year old daughter asked her if for this Christmas they could donate a goat for Africa instead of exchanging gifts. I was in awe.

[coralraven]

:worry:

[receiverwd]

My son is 7 and does not know that I have won some of his x-mas gifts. He might catch on after he opens his 4th present from the Coca-cola fall game. 2 of them are already wrapped and the other 2 have been sent but not received yet. I suppose when he gets older, I might not be able to pull it off.

[kia1971]

I never let my son know if I have won something for him. And, if a package comes to the door, and he asks what it is, I say "make-up". Tell your kids the package is something else (make it up, and make it boring to them).

That is so funny, every package I get my nosey 9 yr old son asks what it is, I always tell him make-up. He says that's boring, and I don't hear about it again. LOL

I think that a gift is a gift, and they should be grateful. I know I'm barely getting anything for my son this year. Sure wish I had won some stuff to give him. He would never know, and certainly wouldn't care!
Happy Holidays!
:gift:

[sweet tea]

First of all, congratulations on your wins. Hide them next year and bring them out when the time is right. Also consider the age of your children. At the ages of 12 and 14 you are doomed to be wrong whatever you do. The next several years will be rough in spite of "sweeping". Enjoy what you can and remember to "BREATH DEEPLY'. It takes lots of oxygen to raise kids. :laugh:

[okibrat]

i also hide anything that will be a potential gift. i learned my lesson about way too much stuff for my kids about 3 or 4 years ago. back in the days of 'freeride' being on the net, i earned enough amazon gift certificates to buy all the presents for both a my kids( including a scooter for dd that year!) it was MY dream christmas, because i was able to give them everything i wanted and more. and it was too overwhelming for them, and only a few of the gifts stood the test of time(not the sccoter, though) i include stuff i win with their gifts that i buy, and they never know the difference.

[meowpossum]

Honestly, if those were my kids I would donate the prizes to charity and buy the kids socks and pencils for Christmas. That gimme-gimme attitude is acceptible in a 6-year-old, but teenagers are too old to have that kind of rudeness and greediness indulged. They're old enough to babysit or mow lawns if they want more-more-more.

[allie]

And what is the true meaning of Christmas? I bet a lot of kids (and adults) don't know this, sadly.

This is another reason I don't open my wins in front of ANY family or friends, who cares if I won the prize - it's a gift and they'd better be happy I thought of them.. oops, didn't mean to get mean.. anyhoo, that's sad. I'd take her to work in a soup kitchen Christmas morning.. but that's just me (and that is what my boys and future kids will do when they are old enough, along with other charity work).

[salymsmommy]

[QUOTE=meowpossum] and buy the kids socks and pencils for Christmas.

Seriously, my mom did that to me one year. Boy was that a wake up call. She just finally got tired of all the bitching. Bought undies too and made me open it all in front of the whole family! This was also the same year that after continuous begging from me for more stuff, she handed over her check book and told me to pay the bills and whatever was leftover I could do whatever I wanted with. Probably not a smart thing to do to with some kids, but I was determined to get as much as I could out of the deal. (with her supervision of course). I made out like a bandit! After all the bills were paid for the month I couldn't decide where I wanted to spent the whole $0.23!! Made me realize how much my mom (a single parent with only $100 per month in child support) stuggled to give me what she could. I quieted down after that.

[Feisty Girl]

Now I know why I don't have kids. You need to put your foot down now--just think in 2 yrs what they will be demanding from you. Let them be grumpy all they want -it'll be hard to not give in but thats why they are that way now. Good Luck!!!

[velvet49329]

Tell your kids that you need all of the wins that you have given them back. When they ask why tell them that you need to sell them for money to buy "real" Christmas presents. :laugh:
Also,I would hide anything that I thought I may want to use for a gift later,and to top that off,if one of my kids said that to me,they would never get another gift that I didn't win and they'd be lucky to get those!

Guess I'm lucky,my kids would never say anything like that.

[peggysue]

im sorry to hear the kids are actin the way they are:( ide be upset if my 7 ur old ever acted like this, i teach her daily how fortunate she is and that alot of kids in her school do not have as much as she does...BUT we have to sit and think? how and where did the kids get this/these attitudes to begin with:(

good luck to all and happy days:) peg

[strchld]

I never let them know when I win. I would tell your son NO WAY on the game. He'll live! :laugh:

[zeuscarl]

Wow, that really stinks. But I agree, maybe you should give them a reality check. Cancel Christmas. Keep what you bought/won, if you think they deserve it in Jan, Feb...Sept. give it to them then. Or perhaps make them donate their gifts at Christmas...

[sweeps aku]

"Ok child, you have clothes, shoes, food & a roof over your head, thus my obligations are met. I do not HAVE to give you gifts! I do that because I like to. You where given the choices & I can only assume from your spoiled rotten, self centered attitude, that you are choosing to do with out gifts this year. Since you do not realize how rude & spoiled your reply, I have called the local charitable organizations & set up a volunteer work schedual for you. This will help you learn about the real world, which I am obligated to teach you about. I will drive you there & pick you up, or you will be grounded thruout the holidays!"

In reality I might go with her, but no amount of temper tantrum would get her out of it. She needs to actually be there seeing how people live in poverty & sickness, with no help, love or family in their lives! She needs a good dose of reality! If she has reached 14 & acts this rotten then it has been too long coming. :soapbox: I believe the MAIN part of being a parent is to prepare the child to live in the real world. Mommy & Daddy may think your a little princess but the world has seen it all before & is not going to spoil her like her parents have. I see too many teens who think that everyone should bend over backwards for them. After all Mommy & Daddy do!!! And they are genuinely shocked when you don't. (this is the part that burns my ... :mad2: ) They don't even realize they are out of line at all, & they think you are a BIT** or worse if you don't give in to their self centered wants. She needs to grow up & she needs to grow up NOW before she lands flat on her face when you are not there to hold her hand. :soapbox: I don't care how bad your life is there is always someone worse off. Maybe she needs to start as a volunteer in a children's cancer hospital, I am sure you can find some thing!

[chinchilla]

I agree with most of what everyone has already expressed, but just want to add one thought. Have your kids had to deal with budgeting before? Do they have a certain amount of Christmas money to spend on gifts for others so they understand that the sky isn't the limit? If not, it's probably something they simply can't relate to. Also, the wins/presents they've already been given really don't feel like Christmas presents anymore. If it isn't under the tree on Christmas morning, it doesn't seem like a gift.

Gomez - congrats on your new baby! :)

[JoyfulNois]

Several points I would like to make....First, being a parent of 16 and 14-year-old daughters, I know the peer pressure has a lot to do with pickiness, etc. But my kids are usually more concerned with others than themselves when it comes to gifts.(Food is another story! :laugh: ) I would not feel guilty for giving wins as gifts. Once, when the kids were younger, we pulled out about $200 in cash in all ones, and told the kids it represented our monthly income. Their eyes lit up, and they were thinking, "hey, this is a lot of money!". Then we said, "Now, give us XX amount for rent. (proportional to what our real expenses were). Then XX for utilities, food, clothes, car, etc. As the pile dwindled, they became more deflated and said it wasn't fair. :shock: We told them that the piddly amount left after all the expenses had to cover everything else we purchased, which is why they were not going to get everything they wanted. It was a very useful experience for them, and they have had a better perspective since then since it was such a visual, concrete example.
Secondly, true Christmas is not about greed. Jesus did not come to earth to promote presents, or do good deeds, He came to save our eternal souls if we accept His gift to us. :gift: The presents are symbolic of this, but it is important to keep perspective. I think the suggestions of working at a shelter are excellent; donating part of Christmas day serving at a soup kitchen could be another.
Being selfish is part of being a teenager, but you can train them not to be with constant and consistent work by providing good examples of why they are better off than they think they are.
Good luck! :cool2:

[Gomez]

If she's old enough to make a wish list on Amazon, she's old enough to read this thread and see that you're definitely NOT the Grinch here and we all agree with you that your daughter is going too far.

[HoneyDo]

"A gift is a gift no matter where it comes from or how much you paid, or didn't pay, as the case may be " as frenchfry said!
I raised 3 and gee if they got that bad I would have said ..
Ok you want to be "BAD" Santa will not come this year at all.
Hide the wins from now on and keep it fun!!
Good luck
Miles

[scooby037]

The simple solution is to not reveal what you win from Sweeps...It is a privilege,not a right that you are sharing your prizes...My advice would be to not reveal what you are winning and wrap them up as Christmas gifts all year long..That way..u kill 2 birds with one stone..Learn that your gratitude is not appreciated all year round but will be appreciated at Christmas..nuff said...

[JCoyne1031]

I know how you feel about kids being bratty. I have a 10 year old nephew, and in the past 5 years, that kid has gone through a playstation, nintendo 64, 2 Gameboys advance (one of which is the new sp model), an X-Box, and a Playstation 2 (which broke after only having it for 2 years) He doesn't take care of anything, and they want to buy him another Playstation 2 to replace the one that broke.

I am curious though, what type of sweeps wins are you giving your kids?

[carolpie]

Things have changed so much from when I was a kid. You had one Barbie if you were lucky and the outfits were the present. Now it's the doll that is the present-they have many. If I got a new fancy dress for my birthday, that was a HUGE deal to me. And Christmas was a few gifts-not tons. But think how much stuff people have today-that's why they have those organization shows-the world is full of junk. We went through some tough years and my kids learned that they couldn't have whatever they wanted. I remember my one daughter crying and I asked her why and she said she needed crayons (and knew at that time money was very tight). My two were artists. I mean we didn't ever go to McDonalds and would go to home openings for free lunches. But it was okay-we were happy. My kids are older now but I don't have problems with that, so if I win, I just give it to them. But I don't even know what I'm going to do for Christmas. Probably get them a few gift cards and candy. We don't do huge presents here, but that's the way we do it. But I would want them to be grateful. You just want your kids to be that way.

[captainmorgan420]

Who cares where the gift comes from right? I would be thrilled either way, just because you won it and didn't pay for it does that make it any less of a gift? Afterall you COULD keep it all for yourself right? I agree with the others, Hide your wins then they can't whine you didn't spend enough on them. I find the whole Holiday thing depressing in the first place, kids these days expect way too much

[Current]

To the original poster and everyone who has responded......I can relate. Being a parent in this day and age is a very tough job. But I can't speak for anyone but me and my children.

I guess I am lucky, I have very compassionate girls, they feel blessed with whatever I can give them, and even then they think of others....neighbors and friends who need help, a friend of theirs who doesn't have much, and especially the women and kids at the battered womans shelter that we volunteer at. I can't tell you how many times they have wanted to give their 'stuff" to others, and the times that they have done just that. As a matter of fact, my oldest one just came up to me this afternoon and asked me what canned foods we had to donate to a family that her classroom had adopted.

Luckily, I am home when the mail and the UPS guy comes to my house. I hide whatever arrives at my doorstep. I bring things out when it is needed, and 9 times out of 10, my girls can think of someone who needs whatever it is, more then they do.

I don't just guess I am lucky, I know I am.

[VSLibby]

Um . . . I have to go call my mom now to apologize . . . for something I did twenty years ago . . . :worry:

--Valerie

[yadgirl]

I guess times have changed! I don't enter for any kids, but I enter my for my mom. When a prize shows up in her name, I wouldn't even consider opening it. She may have won it from my efforts, but it's her choice what she does with it. Lord knows, she worked her butt off to keep my sisters and me happy and healthy.

yad

[lazybonesd]

Thanks for all the replys. I was a very low income single mother for a long time, but I tried hard to give them more gifts than I could afford because I felt guilty for rarely buying them anything the rest of the year. Their dead-beat father's relatives also gave way too much because they felt they had to make it up to them for being poor and not having a father. They quickly grew to expect having a rich kids supply of stuff on a low income.

When I re-married 3 years ago I raised us to working class, but the kids still seem to think we are rich. It doesn't help that just a few blocks away from our housing section are the lower income homes, so the kids go to school with kids that are constantly telling them they live on the rich side of the school discrict.

One poster asked what wins I've been giving them.....to answer that, I've been winning mostly t-shirts which they won't wear since they aren't 'cool', but they've been getting CD's, video games, and cosmetics mostly.

lazybonesd

[Hope]

I have to agree with JoyfulNois that a lot of that has to do with peer pressure.

I believe it is human nature to have a "gimme gimme" attitude.
I mean, isn't that what we are really doing on this site...looking for some company to give us something?

Your kids are perfectly normal. Maybe not all kids are like yours, but I would dare to say most are. I probably would have acted the same way at that age, but I was also very giving, and still am.

Try not to let them find out about your wins. There's no fun in knowing what you already have. My son is receiving a few of my wins, and doesn't know it. However he did check the mail, and low and behold there was a DVD in there that I won and was going to be a gift for him. I went ahead and gave it to him.

Take a deep breathe, put your feet up, drink some hot tea, and relax. Teenagers are probably the meanest people in the world :laugh: , but they won't stay teenagers forever.

[Mary Beth]

My cousin told me something that really made me think when her family was here for Thanksgiving.

Her youngest is now 12 and just got the word on Santa last year.

My cousin was telling her about a certain tribe in Africa who utilize every part of a goat, which often means their survival. Her 12 year old daughter asked her if for this Christmas they could donate a goat for Africa instead of exchanging gifts. I was in awe.

Your cousin should go to http://www.heifer.org where she can donate a goat for Christmas. My siblings, DH's siblings and our nieces and nephews are getting shares of a heifer this year. That's right - we're donating money in the family's name to heifer.org. They will give a heifer to someone who needs it.

[Hope]

I guess times have changed! I don't enter for any kids, but I enter my for my mom. When a prize shows up in her name, I wouldn't even consider opening it. She may have won it from my efforts, but it's her choice what she does with it. Lord knows, she worked her butt off to keep my sisters and me happy and healthy.

yad

That is so sweet! :)

[tamster34]

Since I've been sweeping, I stash the "extras" & give them to my 4 nieces & nephews at Christmas. They think it's great. Frankly I think winning it makes it more special.

My 12 year old son doesn't still have a "real" grasp of money but when we explained money was tight this year, his Christmas list only had 5 things on it, one of which was an email address which he pointed out was free.
I've been holding off on the email because of the all the perverts you hear about but I'll probably break down this year.
Then he can enter all the kids contests. ;)

[Current]

Your cousin should go to http://www.heifer.org where she can donate a goat for Christmas. My siblings, DH's siblings and our nieces and nephews are getting shares of a heifer this year. That's right - we're donating money in the family's name to heifer.org. They will give a heifer to someone who needs it.


Mary Beth,

This is a wonderful charity!!! I was able to do this a few years ago (I donated money for baby chicks, it was what I could afford at the time). If I am not mistaken, you can "donate" lots of animals and such.

When I am able to, I will definately donate to this place again. It is a great idea. :)

[Mary Beth]

Current, I couldn't agree more! We found them about 4 years ago and started our tradition of giving a donation rather than any gifts. This year was the first one where we went wild and got a heifer. It's actually fun to decide how much to donate and then to pick out the animals. DH doesn't care for goats, so we can never "buy" goats, but we've done a lot of others. I remember including honeybees and reminiscing about my grandfather and his bee hives.

Heifer's such a great organization! They're the ones who really teach the people how to fish, rather than just giving them a fish. I love all their stories about the successes.

[sgbecb]

I feel your pain! I'm raising two grandkids (I'm only 46) and they are 10 and 8. The 10
year old told me she wanted a lap top computer for Christmas. I laughed so hard I had tears running out of my eyes. I told her that if she could find a lap top for less than $200, then go buy it. Otherwise, it ain't in the budget. Told her that I didn't have one and what made her think she would get one before me.

[JeannieMC]

My 8 year old little girl said to me one day...

"Mommy, maybe if you win something for me, you can keep it a secret and give it to me for Christmas, that way you don't have to spend any money."

The sweetest words that have ever come out of her mouth.

[Cassie725]

I agree with everyone here... When I get a prize that I think would make a nice gift (birthday, christmas, etc) I wrap it and put a little sticky note on the bottom telling me what it is an put it away never telling anyone I have won anything. :gift: I had to learn this the hard way eveytime I won something if my family thought I couldn't use it they would claim it. It got to the point where when a box came everybody would sit around an wait for me to open it. By using my new system I don't get bugged and I have a gifts when ever I need one. Good Luck with your kids it is kinda hard to break that give me habit or "you are suppose to" habit once that they get a good hold of it, but stay strong you are the parent and you have the last word if all else fails do like I did one year when I had the problem return everything you can and buy yourself a great gift or gifts :gift: an tell them "since they were so unhappy with what they were getting you spent that money on yourself" and the next time you hope they will be happy with what ever they get. Remind them Christmas is not about how many presents you get.

[jenninshelby]

I think wins should be used as gifts for kids. My problem is I always get real excited when I win something for my son and end up telling him about it.

I plan on giving my mom the Celine Dion perfume as part of her Christmas. I doubt she will ever know I won it. Plus it's the thought that counts.

[jenninshelby]

I think this is a (sad) reflection of how things are now. I know that my nieces just rip open their gifts, barely glance at them and then ask for the next one. This really hurts my parents feelings, especially when they have spent so much time picking out the perfect gift.

I don't know how to solve it though. We live in such a gimme, gimme, gimme time and Christmas has just turned into a time to accumulate "stuff".

When I was little (the 80's) I would get one "big" present like a doll and then a few smaller gifts and my stocking. That's it!

Good luck


I have told my son that if he is too greedy and ask for toooo much Santa may not bring him anything. This may be mean but it works. This year he only has a PS2 and one game for it on his Christmas list. My parents are buying him both these gifts so I am gonna probably get him another game and some other stuff. They have always been really good about getting him big gifts and I am so thankful for that.

[Micky]

It's honestly and truly sad the way people are today. It's not just kids, it's adults too. If I ever even thought of speaking to my parents the way I see/hear many kids talking to theirs, I would have been gumming it my entire life because my teeth would have been knocked down my throat. I was taught to be respectful to everyone, no matter who they are or how old they were. To this day I call everyone ma'am and sir, to this dismay of many women lol
Too many parents, in my opinion, allow the kids to rule them instead of the other way around. My kids wouldn't be getting anything except the lint that had accumulated in the bottom of the stocking over the years if they acted like that.
But, that's just me.
Congrats on the great wins, by the way. Too bad you and your family haven't been able to truly enjoy them.

[BlueIrishEyes]

Wow--A lot of good responses and a lot of thoughts to your Christmas situation.

I agree with everyone who said it is OK to give wins as Christmas presents. The problem is if they already know about the wins, then opening them on Christmas morning is not a surprize. But what's done is done and next year maybe you can secret those wins away and no one will be the wiser. If they are snoopers like many, take them to work and stash them there--or better yet have them delivered to your work place if allowable. That keeps you from having to tell a little white lie when they ask what is in the package.

A thought on a reality check. Why not take them to a mall or one of the stores that has gift trees and give them $10.00 if you have it to spare. Let them pick out a name and explain that is all this child will get is what they choose. Maybe that will put a little of the true Christmas spirit back in their heads.

Peer pressure is definitely a problem and that is natural. Not much you can do but instill the values you want your children/adolescents to have and hope for the best.

Try a change--involve them in ways to make Christmas the most memorable without spending much extra. Bake goodies for friends, neighbors, mailpersons and let them deliver. Decorate sugar cookies together--the whole day--icing, sprinkles etc. I found the more I immersed my girls in the aura of the holiday--they were happier and less into greed.

Merry Christmas and Happy Sweeping!!!!

[bran_dp]

blueirisheyes

when I was about 14ish I said something to my mom that I'm sure was bratty, spoiled (which I most certainly was not) and just plain mean. I was just seeing how far I could go I guess. Her reply "If you EVER speak to me that way again, I'll make you a permanent fixer in that wall!"

If you knew my mom, you would know that she was completely serious!

[skpaw]

I had to laugh when I read the post--I won something and I did not tell kids what it is. They know something might come before Christmas. My daughter said "shouldn't prizes be extra gifts?" much like the other 14 year old. My kid was not upset or having a fit--more of a debate. I explained to her IF I CHOOSE to share, it is something she will like and it is as good as if I buy it at the store. Once I started to read this to her she was embarased about her bratty moment.

[ResourcePress]

Congrats on your win and boy am I glad you asked your question to OS! I have teens and they have attitudes about me sweeping and that they are owed stuff. It is my time and I am choosing to spend an hour or two a day on sweeps. I am earning my wins. My husband also says that the wins are mine and I can do with them what I choose to do.
Two days ago I won a RIO mp3 player and hesitated to tell my son. Glad that I didn't tell him because it is going to show up as a present soon.